After I wrote a blog post the other day about Nick Vujicic, I realized that there was a lot left out. For instance, how does one go from sad, depressed, or grief stricken to happy? How do we end up finding happy?
Finding Happy
We hear Nick talk about the difficulties of having no arms or legs and that he was able to work through his challenges and see them in a whole new perspective. But I find often what is missing is an explanation of “how do I get to happy when I’m bawling my eyes out?”
I surely know that just thinking the word only helps a little, and I find myself especially frustrated when someone tries to explain to me why I shouldn’t be feeling the way I am and says the words, “but you have so much to be grateful for!”. Trying to fix someone’s emotions never really works. It only ends in the emotional person enveloped in another emotion: anger and, undoubtedly, frustration then arises for the “fixer”. In the end the emotional person is now even more enveloped in his or her “stuff”.
What I have found works the best for me is to let myself feel any and all emotions. It is with the fully feeling of them 2 things happen for me:
- I acknowledge them as being valid. When we tell ourselves we should not be feeling something (or someone else tells you directly or implies this), we are creating a field of unacceptance. The result is for the emotions to grow and grow and encompass our being.
- I allow them to move through me fully and completely. Sometimes this may take a few minutes and sometimes it may be a few hours. But because I am allowing them to be, they move fluidly and eventually move on out. If I or someone else is giving me any indication that I should not be feeling them or using “common sense” or logic to help me, this creates resistance. And when resistance mixes with emotions, this is a bad thing and they only hang around longer. They may even be settling back in my body somewhere, just waiting until a later time when they are triggered again. The acknowledgment of #1 is what allows them to be and flow.
The bottom line is this: our emotions are valid and should never ever be thought of otherwise. Once we realize this we can accept them (these means we have zero judgement) and they go along there merry way.
It takes practice and it’s important that we all find our own way of moving along our emotional paths. We can then be in control of how we arrive at Happy. No matter how you get there or how long or how quickly it takes doesn’t matter. The more you practice the art of feeling, the happier you will be!
Finding happy is closer than you think.
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